Why I Stopped Comparing My Reflection to Others

Photo Credit: Alexei Miradashvili on Unsplash

When I would scroll through social media, I would get anxious and depressed. I’d see the smooth skin, the effortless smiles, the perfect families on vacations — doing the things I used to do and wished I could do again, and somewhere inside I’d start wondering why I didn’t measure up anymore. After living with health challenges and seasons of exhaustion, it was easy to believe that I had somehow fallen behind — not just in looks, but in life.

Comparison doesn’t always roar. Sometimes it whispers. It slips in through photos, conversations, and even everyday life. It tells us that if we were only 'a little more,' then maybe we’d be worthy of admiration, love, or success. But the truth is, comparison drains the very joy God wants us to radiate.

One day, during a particularly hard FND flare-up, I caught myself looking in the mirror with envy in my eyes. I realized I was seeing everyone else’s highlight reel, but in my own reflection I saw only weakness. That’s when the Spirit whispered a question to my heart: 'Who told you that your reflection had to look like hers?' It stopped me. God’s words have always been filled with compassion, never competition. I needed to stop comparing my weaknesses to other people’s strengths.

Doctrine & Covenants 18:10 – Remember Your Worth

‘Remember the worth of souls is great in the sight of God.’

It reminded me that my worth isn’t found in comparison — it’s found in calling. My reflection doesn’t need to compete with anyone else’s; it simply needs to reflect Him. I began praying differently: not 'Heavenly Father, make me more like her,' but 'Heavenly Father, help me become more like You.'

Slowly, I am learning to bless the women who inspire me instead of comparing myself to them. I thank God for their light and ask Him to show me how to shine in my own way. And when I look in the mirror, I am beginning to speak truth instead of criticism: 'I am enough.' 'My reflection doesn’t define my worth — His reflection in me does.' The more I practice gratitude for who I am, the less I long to be anyone else.

Grace Notes:

• Gratitude dissolves comparison — praise God for another’s light and your own will begin to glow again.

• The mirror is not a measuring stick; it’s a reminder that you are still a masterpiece in progress.

• When you compare less, you connect more.

Elder Dieter F. Uchtdorf said: “We spend so much time and energy comparing ourselves to others—usually comparing our weaknesses to their strengths. This drives us to create expectations for ourselves that are impossible to meet. As a result, we never celebrate our good efforts because they seem to be less than what someone else does. Be thankful for all the small successes ... These successes may seem tiny to you, and they may go unnoticed by others, but God notices them and they are not small to Him.”

The more I let go of comparison, the more room there is for compassion — and that’s where true beauty lives.